Thursday, September 20, 2012

Taking a little break...




September has rolled around yet again and it is time to pack our bags and head off on our yearly adventure. If you have been following this blog for a while, you will know that Nick doesn't *do* travelling.

I have been throwing around a few titles to describe how I feel about taking off and leaving my boy at home......

Damned if I do and damned if I don't

Am I an awful mother for leaving my child in the care of others? How could I fly off into the wild blue yonder and leave him behind? How can I leave him in a country where we have no relatives to come to his aid? (The nearest being Zimbabwe). Is it terribly appalling to take this leap every year and hope for the best? 

What about me, my hubs and our first born?..... We love travelling and to be deprived of this may cause resentment. Our first born also needs time with us and in all honesty he doesn't get as much attention as his younger brother. This is the one time that we can be together without the added responsibility of Nick. As much as we adore our Nick, we do need time out!

Putting myself first

If you know me personally, you will be aware that I spend a lot of time with Nick. It may not always be productive, however, I am there for him. The only break I get during the week is when he is at school and it is very rare for me not to be at that school gate to collect him at 12.30pm. I don't begrudge having my boy with me and I make good use of my mornings to ensure that I do get some *me* time! There are days when I start to feel a little antsy and I know that I need a block of time away from my day to day routine. Yes, I feel it is important to put myself first (occasionally!), after all I am going to be parenting Nick for a very long time, far longer than what I originally planned. 


If I had a bucket list (and my mission statement for Nick)

This could also be titled... so many countries, so little time!
I blame my parents for my love of travel. My Welsh Dad went to sea at the age of 15 and travelled the world. My English Mum immigrated to New Zealand when she was 21 ~ it was a toss up between NZ and Canada! Mum met Dad on the ship to NZ and after 5 weeks (5 weeks, people!) Dad proposed! To cut a long story short, they settled in NZ and had 4 daughters. Very sadly, my Dad passed away too young ~ the very last time I spoke to him was to tell him that I was getting married. I miss him. A lot.

Back to the bucket list. I haven't made one, although if I do, I would have to include the following;
* Take Nick on a 2 hour plane trip for a family weekend away.
* Take Nick to Zimbabwe (by plane) to visit family.
* Take Nick to New Zealand to visit family (gulp).
* Me and the hubs to take Nick to the USA, hire a camper van and do a bit of touring (double gulp).

Bye bye boy!

Each time we go away I leave behind a letter of wishes. It is horrible to put together, however, very necessary. It is certainly not a professional letter, more a quick note on what to do and who to contact if we don't make it home! This post is ringing bells for me..... I dare not look at last year's post just in case it reads exactly the same as this one. Anyway, the letter and Nick's passport are all organised and I have placed them in my junk drawer.


It goes without saying that I am so excited about our trip, although very sad that we have to leave Nick at home. I do feel comfort that he will be well looked after and in my heart of hearts I know that he is happiest at home.

~*~

“A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.” - Lao Tzu




8 comments:

  1. Have a fabulous time!!!!!!!!!! I especially love the last line in the bucket list... Camper van around the USA..... From New Jersey to California... :)
    My bucket list usually includes USA states...Im sort of a chicken to fly outside but Noah just came home with a permission slip for a Germany trip OH MY GOODNESS!!

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  2. I understand that torn feeling, but life as a carer stretches out endlessly when you have a child with special needs and almost all carers need a break to recharge, refresh and keep going. Believe me, as soon as Smiley is happy in respite I will be off somewhere too xx

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  3. Oh I hope you have a brilliant time. Completely understand how you feel torn in two but I'm sure Nick will have a better time staying at home than he would travelling with you, and I agree you do need respite. Thinking of you and hoping you have a wonderful refreshing adventure! Vix x

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  4. That would be so cool if the last item on your bucket list came true!!!

    Enjoy you vacation!

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  5. Thank you all for your wonderful comments. Apologies for not replying to each of you separately! About to board very soon..... Bye for now!! :)

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  6. You so need this break, you your husband and your other child. It must be a very difficult thing to do but you are doing the right thing. You are NOT a bad mum! Go, enjoy and come back refreshed :-)

    xx Jazzy

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  7. I've always wanted to travel more but feel like we cannot until Zip gets a little older. I hope you're having a wonderful time!

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  8. Dear Jazzy and Zipmommy
    The break was wonderful... China is an incredibly interesting country to visit! Look forward to catching up with your blog posts!

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