April ~ Day Twenty Seven

Have you ever gone non-verbal? To clarify, I am talking about communication without speech/the spoken word. Being non-verbal means relying on other avenues of communication.... facial expressions, eye gaze, body language, position of body, shrugs, noises, gestures.

With this in mind I wrote up a new framework for an activity we did the other day. My goal for this activity was to focus on non-verbal communication, joint attention and co-regulatory patterns.


Activity:

Unstacking the dishwasher (again!)


Roles:

I pass a plate to Nick.
Nick puts it on the counter
x3

We swap roles
Nick passes me an item
I put it on the counter
x3

We swap roles
I pass Nick a cup
He puts it in the cupboard
x3

We carry on in this manner until the dishwasher has been emptied.

Note:  Nick's edge+1 will be the continuous changing of roles.


Limits:

No distractions... doors closed to keep out the dogs! Aim to have an empty dishwasher. Do not use speech.


Communication:

No speech. Use facial expressions, noises, body language, gestures. When changing roles, move my body to a new place to communicate the new role. Slow down and wait for Nick to pick up on my non-verbal cues. Relax and go with the flow.


What happened:

If only I had filmed this! We coordinated our movements beautifully. After handing Nick the three items, I stopped in my tracks and then deliberately moved my body so that I was standing away from the dishwasher and closer to the bench. He immediately picked up on this cue and took on his new role. We continually referenced each other for information and adjusted what we were doing as we went along. Our engagement was a wonderful example of what can be achieved without speech. The joint attention was WOW and I am so thrilled that our simple activity turned into a successful little dance between the two of us.

Flowers are more interesting than pots and pans!

Scaffolding for Independence

I shared this RDI post a few weeks back. It's a quick read so click right here to get the background of today's post.

I have been thinking about how to scaffold different sections of our last planned engagement to enhance Nick's learning experience. My wish is to guide Nick in such a way that he feels comfortable with uncertainty and also ensure that the challenge he is faced with is not too overwhelming. In RDI speak we call this 'edge + 1'.

For example: Nick finds it difficult to judge the amount of Nesquik powder to collect on his teaspoon and he invariably overloads the spoon (the instructions state to use three teaspoons). I threw around a few ideas and eventually decided on the easiest one. Nick could spoon two teaspoons of the powder into his glass! You can check out our experience in the following clip.

Before you watch the (one minute) clip, I would like you to take note of a few things.

* Watch me and observe how I scaffold this part of the activity. Take note that I am only using declarative language and I also make sure to pause and wait for Nick to respond. I don't tell him what to do. I make suggestions and the decision to participate is Nick's. Watch how he references me for information and guidance. We are working together nicely without any pressure.

1. I reflected on a previous experience. This was to encourage Nick to recollect what happened last time and also give him a clue of what is going to happen next.

2. I pause and let Nick take the initiative.

3. I don't jump in and assist when Nick takes three teaspoons. I let him finish... and then spotlight that he 'forgot' and remind him that we are going to do two teaspoons.

4. I decide to add in a little challenge and let Nick know that we are going to try again.

5. I didn't assist in any way while Nick was having his second attempt. I gave him the time to make his own decision.

6. I made sure to spotlight what happened.

I realise that I wasn't going to share any more video footage of us, however, I find that a visual representation of an interaction is powerful and extremely helpful. It is much easier for me to share a clip with you, than write a very long blog post explaining the whole process. Video footage helps me to reflect on our activity and think about our way forward. Nick also gets to watch himself in action and I am sure it helps him to encode the experience and add it to his memory bank for future reference.

So, what did you think? Was the video clip helpful? Did it give you some ideas on how to use declarative language? Did you notice that I was providing opportunities for Nick to think for himself and make his own decisions? Did you find our interaction encouraging?

Living in the moment

Yes, I know.... I did say that I wouldn't be sharing any more video footage of Nick. BUT, this clip makes my heart sing! It is only a small segment of the original footage; therefore, you are not getting the whole story.

I have chosen this particular piece to spotlight a few things that stood out for me. The video runs for less than a minute!

The connection between us is just too precious. Nick is enjoying the interaction with me. He is focused and continually references my face and body language for information, enjoyment and experience sharing.

We each have a role to play. In this case, we were using a reciprocal pattern (I take a turn, you take the same turn). Although, it has to be said, Nick expanded on his turn! He decided to take a brick and then deliberately knock some of the others off the stack. Not once but twice. I love that he took this initiative and then looked at me each time to check out my reaction.

I am providing guidance by slowing down the activity, really drawing out my turn and building up the anticipation. I use noises and declarative comments to spotlight different aspects of our interaction.

We have a lovely co-regulatory pattern happening and we are sharing the experience. It's good fun and Nick will have a really nice episodic memory of our time together. Moments like these are highly motivating and addictive. Mindful guiding really works a treat. #RDI

~*~

"Mindful of being in the moment and really enjoying what you have now."

Dr Sarah Wayland

Laughing with RDI

Give a boy a water pistol and he knows exactly what to do with it! Not so with my Nick. 

First up is the anxiety of being introduced to a new game. Next is figuring out how to hold the pistol correctly and then adjust the finger pressure in order to squirt the water. Further motor planning is required to set up obstacles to shoot at; and then planning how to aim the pistol so that the water hits the target.

Not very easy for Nick, yet it is doable.

I set up a planned engagement for us to have some fun together. The objective was for Nick to discover how to do all of the above, with enough scaffolding to prevent him from becoming too anxious (edge plus 1). With a lot of guidance from me, we set up some plastic cups on top of a balustrade and then spent some time modeling and practicing how to hold the water pistol and pull the trigger. We then took turns to shoot the cups. To be honest with you, Nick didn't really enjoy the experience, although by the time we had finished, he did share a couple of smiles. Note: I always ensure that we end on success and spotlight the important parts of our engagement. 

The second time (a few days later), I invited Nick to join me in another 'shoot the cup' session. Nick immediately headed to the balustrade, therefore I knew that he had remembered our previous experience. Note: It was windy and I was very interested to see how Nick would cope with this variation. I passed Nick a plastic cup and he carefully positioned it on the rail. It sat there for five seconds and then blew off. He looked at me with a puzzled expression. I passed him another cup. It also blew away moments after he had placed it.

What happened next was so delightful and really highlighted to me the importance of ensuring that engagements should not be task driven. Nick laughed out loud and turned to me share the experience. He took another cup... and it blew off as he placed it. His laughter was contagious and I made sure to pause what was happening and spotlight to him what fun we were having. I then added a variation to our engagement by inviting Nick to help me collect the cups from the garden below. This was another edge plus 1 moment and he coped so well with the extra challenge. #werockflexibility

Perhaps I should have ended the engagement there, however, I felt that Nick could be stretched a little bit further, therefore I decided to move our game to the other side of our house where there was no wind. This caused him to show a bit of anxiety, yet when he saw that we were doing the same game, he quickly recovered. He also remembered how to hold and shoot with the water pistol. Yay. We had an absolute blast (pun not intended!) taking turns to shoot the cups.... and then the dogs! :)

Helpful reminders;

I didn't use a lot of language.
I made an occasional comment.
My comments were declarative/inviting.
I paused a lot to give Nick time to think for himself.
I scaffolded/guided when necessary.
I spotlighted moments that I thought were important for Nick to remember.

I ♥ RDI

The joy that the attached video clip gives me is indescribable; and in fact I have been sitting on this post for a few days. It has been difficult to find the words to explain how I feel about the footage.

To be perfectly honest with you, Nick is severely autistic and he has really battled over the years, dealing with anxiety, uncertainty, feelings of incompetence, lack of communication and huge sensory needs. In short, life has not been easy for him and the stress on us as a family has been immense.

Having a child who was unable to go out into the community made our days very restrictive. Dealing with his stress over the slightest change in routine was soul destroying. Being a mum and living with a child who had no desire to *connect* broke my heart.

When we first started with RDI, I took on board that our journey was a 'marathon, not a sprint'. I let go of my desire to rush my way through Nick's development. I accepted that the role I needed to play as Nick's parent was huge. Our journey wasn't just about him; it was also about me and how 'together' we could progress.

This video clip is a culmination of years of working with my son. It shows how we engage with each other in a meaningful way. The actual activity is not important, it is only a prop for our engagement. So much is evident throughout the clip.... joint attention, co-regulation, pausing, referencing, pacing, non verbal communication, edge plus one, experience sharing, trust and enjoyment.

For interest sake; these days, Nick is incredibly flexible (not so much with food!) and he loves going out. As for change, routines, structure and problems with transitioning... what are those? You can see for yourself that the desire to connect is now there! :)

Onward and upward!